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What I Expected
Welcome to What I Expected—a podcast for women in their 30s, 40s, and 50s about what to really expect, before you experience it. So much about getting older has changed since your grandmother's day, and the advice she used to pass down doesn't always fit the world you're actually living in. Think of this as that same wisdom, updated for modern life—your toolkit for the changes, the purchases, and the moments you wish someone had prepped you for. What to ask, what to plan for, before you spend your money, your time, or your peace of mind.
Except it's not a lecture. Think of it like the advice you'd get from your closest girlfriends—minus 47 unread messages. We break through the hype with honest, no-nonsense answers, sensible standards, and zero pressure to keep up.
New episodes every Tuesday—covering everything from Pilates to jewelry to the changes your body springs on you—for women who'd rather hear it straight from a friend than find out the hard way.
What I Expected
Pilates: What to Expect Before Your First Lesson
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Pilates has been having a moment online lately, especially reformer Pilates — and I remember exactly how overwhelming that felt when I was starting out. In this episode, I sit down with Amy Ulmer, a certified Pilates instructor I personally train with and trust, to break it all down in plain English.
I've been practicing Pilates for about 25 years, and I can't imagine my life without it — it transformed my body and put an end to the muscle strains and random spasms that used to leave me flat on my back for days.
Whether you're Pilates-curious or ready to book your first class, we're covering how to get started, what it typically costs, who it's great for, what to watch out for, and why it might be worth it — so you can decide if it's right for you.
Intro
Speaker 1Welcome to What I Expected, the show that sets expectations before you buy. My website and social channels compare real life experience to marketing promises. But think of this podcast as your decision-making toolkit. What to ask before you spend your money, or your time, which is your most precious possession. Think of it like advice from a close circle of girlfriends, minus the 47 unread messages. At What A Expected, you'll find friendly standards, sensible expectations, and feel zero pressure to keep up. Before we start, this episode is for general education and informational purposes only. It's not medical advice. If you're managing an injury, pain, or a medical condition, or you're pregnant or postpartum, check in with your healthcare professional before starting a new exercise program. And always work within your own comfort and limits. Today we're talking about Pilates with Amy Ulmer, a certified Pilates instructor in Jacksonville, Florida, and someone I personally train with and trust. She's also great at breaking it down in plain English. Fitness trends come and go, but Pilates has real staying power. I've been practicing for about 25 years and I can't imagine my life without it. It's transformed my body and honestly my day-to-day comfort. I used to get muscle strains and random spasms that would put me flat on my back for days on end. After a few years of Pilates, that totally stopped. Actually, it stopped, except when, maybe when I don't see you, then I do get hurt. Yes. And now with perimenopause, I also get a lot of weird aches and pains. Pilates is a non-negotiable for me, though. It's an investment in my own wellness. But lately online, I've seen a renewed interest in reformer Pilates, and it reminded me how overwhelming it can feel when you're brand new to it. So today's episode is for anyone who's curious about Pilates or considering trying it. We're going to cover how to get started, what it typically costs, who it's great for, what to watch out for, and why it matters so you can decide if it's right for you. So let's get into it.
Meet Amy Ulmer
Speaker 1Amy, welcome. I'm so happy you're here because you're the person I would text if I had a Pilates question. Now everyone gets to be on our group text. Oh, I love that. Thank you. Could you introduce yourself, who you are, what you do, and how you got into Pilates?
SpeakerYeah. So again, my name's Amy. I'm a Pilates instructor over in Jacksonville. I work at a couple different studios. I fell in love with Pilates. I had a nagging back issue. And my doctor said, let's turn to Pilates. I found it. I loved it. But I also thought it could be a little bit different. I wanted to cater it my way. So I went to school, got all my certifications, started teaching and tweaked it a little bit to how I would want to work out.
Speaker 1And I think that's so important to know. And that's why if somebody is getting into it, if you go to one instructor asking somebody what their style is and what kind of things, it's okay to ask all those questions if you call the studio because everybody does have a little different way about them. What do you love the most about teaching?
Why Pilates
SpeakerMy goodness, I love so much. So loving the energy when I'm around people. I'm loving to be able to tell them some more about their body, how it moves, just creating an awareness for them that they never had before. For you, let's just say, I'm not trying to call you out, but you have to call me out. You have Holly has just a little bit more of an internal rotation. And so I see that when I work with you, and so my goal is to try to strengthen your abductors. So I'll put you in a certain situation that you necessarily wouldn't even know that you are in. And you don't know that you make those repetitive movements every single day. So I love when I can find something like an imbalance and try to correct that person so I can remove them from any pain or any situations that's gonna arise.
Speaker 1And actually, that's a really good point of why I love Pilates, because I want somebody to correct me. It's also why we'll get into it later, but why I recommend starting with a few private lessons is finding out what you're doing wrong because we're all like we're born and we have certain tendencies. And like you mentioned, I internally rotate. I notice myself getting better when I'm working on that. It's almost like I'm doing physical therapy, but I'm I'm not.
Finding a Studio & Instructor
Speaker 1So Pilates instructors have these different styles. There's some that I've been to that were really fluid. It was just, it was really slow moving, very gentle. Then there's instructors like you, which I love because I knew when you're gonna say stop doing that, do this. And also I'm gonna feel it in the morning, but in a good way. So, how if I'm getting started at Pilates, or say I've moved to a new area, because that did happen to me where I moved from California to Florida, how are you gonna find the right instructor or studio?
SpeakerSo I would definitely, I think a lot of people go to these nice, pretty studios, right? They're aesthetically beautiful and you want to be in that space. You get down on that reformer, and then you have an instructor who sits and talks about breathing. And you have to understand that these clients are coming in because they want to move. They have a nervous energy. You get them moving, then you can start talking to them. So it doesn't necessarily mean finding the prettiest studio. It's trying to seek the best instructor that aligns up with your energy and what you're feeling that day. So I can sense that a little bit when I, if I'm we're doing stretches, I'm like, okay, these ladies, they want to get some energy out. Let me get them to jump today. Let's get that. Then I will work them back and where I wanted to work with. Does that make sense? Yes. Yes, that makes perfect sense. Okay. So looking for the studio, um, you got to make sure that your class sizes aren't too big. Um, I don't agree with any more than four or five reformers in a room. I think it's way too much for an instructor. I'm running around, we have six reformers in one of my studios, and I'm running around correcting everybody. And it's really hard to progress some clients while I'm fixing somebody else.
Speaker 1So I think a lot of movement and you're still trying to correct.
SpeakerYes. And it can be a disaster. I've done it enough times where I'm like, okay, I can progress this client over here. She wants to go. This client wants to stay right here. And so cueing all of them, it's a challenging thing, class sizes. So if I was starting out, I would look for a smaller class size. You're I would definitely reach out and do privates first, though.
Speaker 1Okay. And are there any specific certifications that can help you know that you're getting somebody that really knows Pilates and that has gone through the training and is skilled?
SpeakerYes. And I'm hoping that every Pilates instructor out there is certified. That would make me worrisome. Um, because the they go in depth about anatomy. It's a long training, it's anywhere from like six months to a year. It's pricey as well. Um but I it's okay to ask that person what kind of training they've had. I'm balanced body. There's stats, there's multiple. I think even now there's some so many trainings available. And some studios are doing their own instructor. Oh, yes. Okay. I think it's just a business opportunity for them. And those can be great too, but sometimes I want to go basically where it started.
Speaker 1Yeah. Yeah. People that have been doing it for a really long time and that follow some of those original methods. Yep.
Pilates for Athletes
Speaker 1So one of the things interesting about you, and I've seen this when I've been into Cortex. I know you train in a lot of different studios, but I've noticed it in particular at Cortex, is you work with professional athletes. And I remember maybe about 10 years ago, golfers were getting into Pilates and it was helping with their swing. But you work with a lot of professional baseball and football players. Tell me about that.
SpeakerHow tell me what that's like. I think they've been told that Pilates gives them longevity, enhances their performance, but sometimes they're unaware of why they're doing that. They go into a gym and they are basically like a machine and they just move and they don't have a body awareness. When they come to Pilates, it kind of reveals the reformer, reveals their imbalances. Oh, okay. So it also humbles them a little bit because they're not as strong as they are and they're seeing that. And I think it's time for us to work on those imbalances. They can work on pelvic stability, a lot of things that they don't get out of working out in the gym. And honestly, I think that prevents injuries, enhances their performance, and it does create longevity in their sport.
Speaker 1Yeah. And you have to love seeing these elite athletes who have only used their major muscle groups, discovering their minor muscle groups.
SpeakerThose tiny little fibers start to shake. And sometimes they look at me and they ask if it's okay that they're shaking so bad. They get a little worried. And I was like, yes, we've just turned on all your small stabilizers. They're turning on and they're asking for help in your body. And that's why you see that shaking.
Speaker 1Oh, love it. And so they are seeing, so you said you mentioned a couple things. You talked about exposing imbalances, teaching control, more body awareness, and then working these minor muscles where a lot of workouts, you're just really focusing on major muscles. So this is just in general, prevents injury, right? Absolutely. And what is just give us what's been like the best feedback you've gotten, maybe from one of these athletes?
SpeakerAthletes. Oh, goodness. Oh, my hips no longer hurt. Oh, that is good. And Pilates is settled changes, it's not drastic. and they also take that work and they transfer it into the gym. So creating that body awareness, they have more connection with their muscles. So when they do that heavy deadlift, they're contracting in, they're driving that navel towards the spine as they're lifting up with that deadlift. So the work does transfer over. And I think it it definitely creates an entire body awareness that they've never had.
Speaker 1Yeah, and the core strength. Absolutely. Yes. Yeah. So
Reformer vs. Mat Pilates
Speaker 1there we're talking specifically today about reformer Pilates, which is on the reformer, and there's some different ones. There's like the Cadillac and different types of reformers, but they that can be overwhelming. And some people may not even have a Pilates studio in their town. So really that's not going to be an option for them. What would you say is the difference between reformer Pilates and Matt Pilates?
SpeakerSo reformer has resistance. It moves, so you're working on balance. It gives you a little bit more stability. Um, mat is great. That's where you learn all your fundamental basics. You learn the principles of Pilates and your pelvic stability, your imprint. Um, you do have more room for air to create bad habits on that mat. So that's why I always say go in, do a private with somebody, and then transfer that work back to the mat. Um, whereas the reformer, you get more feedback from that.
Speaker 1Yeah, that's a great idea. So even if you're whether you're gonna do a class or you don't have someone, even you could be on a vacation and maybe make an appointment at the resort if they have it, and do at least a couple privates to give you that awareness. So for a true beginner, I think we agree on that. It doesn't matter which one, but it's just learning those early fundamentals.
SpeakerAbsolutely.
Speaker 1So pretend I'm brand new. Interested, a little intimidated. Am I just Googling Pilates Studios? For me, I would probably ask around. I would ask some friends because that's my way. But I also remember when I came to Florida and I was new here and I I didn't know. So I you Google it, you look online, you look at what the studio looks like, and then you just start making phone calls.
SpeakerYes. And then you find a studio and you may go to your first class and never connect with that first instructor, but don't give it up because there are instructors out there. Keep trying. Most studios have two or three instructors there, um, one that maybe fits you better. So there are people out there. You just like a hairstylist, you just gotta hunt them down. Yeah.
Speaker 1Or an interior decorator. Absolutely a good fit. Okay. Um, and then I think one of the things that I've always thought is interesting is being clear on your goal with your instructor, right? If somebody knows what they want, less pain, they want um more strength, better posture, whatever it is, that helps you know where to start with them.
Amy Ulmer (Guest)Absolutely.
Holly Bohn PittmanSo we talked about credentials and training and looking at that. And then you talked about class size. One thing I thought, and it was it was great that you talked about not being wowed by just necessarily what the studio looks like, because that can certainly mislead us. safety and environments are are there any kind of things you could you should be aware of? The safety protocol of the the teaching or like in a studio, is there anything you would think about? Or are they cleaning or you need to pay attention to that, or do you think that's pretty standard? I know for me, I've fallen before when I've had like if you don't feel comfortable doing something, somebody pushing you to do it, like if you feel off balance or you're not ready or whatever, they should be listening to you if you're saying that's I can't do it. I feel like you're the right balance of telling me, pushing me, because of course I'm gonna try to get out of things. Yes. But also recognizing so that I have never gotten an injury with you.
Avoiding Injury
SpeakerYes. Um, and I think I take a huge responsibility as a teacher, knowing that there's a kneeling arm series work. And I don't teach that to an entire class um all the time unless I know who I have in my class. Um, if somebody comes to me that day and they're just feeling unstable, they're weak, they're tired, they were up in the middle of the night, I'm not gonna be doing a ton of balance stuff. Um, I think you have to go in and strategically plan when your client gets there. You can plan all day long, but you are gonna go to plan B as soon as something happens, or if they're saying, hey, I'm just not feeling like it. Can we stretch today?
Speaker 1And I have heard some when I brought somebody in a friend and and she mentioned that she has the hip impingement or her wrists get really sore. And so you've made small adjustments there. Yes. I think that's something um that I've noticed a trait in good instructors is being aware of that and saying, okay, we can accomplish the same thing, but do this and it's easier. Yes.
Pilates at Any Age
Speaker 1What about age? What are your age ranges of people you're training?
SpeakerThis is why I love Pilates because anybody can do it. I have my kids, they started getting on that reformer at eight years old. And then my oldest client right now is 78. Oh, wow. So it's amazing. Yes. All ages are welcome.
How Much Does Pilates Cost?
Speaker 1And let's talk money. Because we don't want to waste our money or our time. Right. So I know just depending on where you are in the US, it can be between $100 and $160 an hour for private. Um, and and we're we we definitely have recommended that in this that you just start with that. But what do classes run? What are what are you seeing? Or there's also duos, right? Where you can do two people at a time. So if you have a friend that wants to get started with you, how what are some more affordable options?
SpeakerSo classes are probably around 25 to they go all the way up to $50, depending on the studio. Duos are you can do $50, I think they're anywhere from $40 to $50 per person. And then you were right, with privates, it's around $100, $160 for the hour.
Speaker 1And do you think I keep throwing that out there, but I don't want to put words in your mouth, is two enough? If somebody was starting, how many privates would they ideally do before they went into a class?
SpeakerI would say two would be enough. Sometimes one, if they just understand it. Some people are just a little bit more aware of how their body moves. So it depends on the person. Okay. And I would work with that person and I would say, okay, you understand. You, if I say, Hey, can you give me a poster chill with your pelvis and you can do that in the first session? You can probably go to a class.
Speaker 1Okay. So you have your ways that you test them. Yes. And then I do think about people that can't afford reformer Pilates, like maybe it's just too expensive. They have their monthly gym membership. That's really the last. Or maybe they don't even have a gym. And so I one online option that I love is the Amanda Blauer Pilates membership. So that's $39, $39.99 a month. And I've been a member of that for years because some of it I could just take bands like with me when I was traveling and throw them in my suitcase and then still do something.
SpeakerThat's amazing. And not feel like when I got back that I was gonna get in trouble with you. No, I think that's a great option. And I love that it's available for everybody. Yes.
Speaker 1You said you have a reformer at home, though, right? Yes. So when you started doing Pilates, did you just say, I love this, I'm gonna get a reformer? I did it mostly for stretching.
SpeakerReally? Yes, I love it. I love the machine for stretching. And you get your whole family on it? Yes.
Speaker 1Your husband.
SpeakerIt's my goal. Uh, I don't know about him.
Speaker 1So a couple of things, like we we talked about is making sure that you have somebody that's correcting you. And uh even before you start the the online, I think you can. And some of these online, they'll maybe even do a zoom with you, but definitely Pilates, you can get hurt. I I think for me, like my neck too. Uh, there's times where my body says, I'm doing Pilates, and my neck says, You are not doing Pilates, you are injuring yourself.
SpeakerAbsolutely. Yes, you're initiating that move with your neck and not your chest. Yeah. So, yes, there is definitely some areas where you can get you can hurt yourself during Pilates.
What to Wear to Pilates
Speaker 1And something I wouldn't have thought about, I don't think about at 52 very often. I really don't care what I'm wearing. Um, but I think there are a few tips there because you don't want all your lady parts hanging out and Pilates is there. You are moving around, your legs are open and spread and I am in your business. Yes.
SpeakerYes. So what do you wear? Clothes, like tight fitting clothes. I want to see your spine. I want to be able to see your pelvis move, especially when I work with the boys. Sometimes I'll have to hold the back of their shirt just to see their spine. I ask them to wear just more like a fitted shirt if we can. Sometimes they just take the whole shirt off. But women, yes, is fitted clothes. Yeah.
Speaker 1So don't be embarrassed. You need to see their body to be able to correct. Yes. Okay. Yes. And then I've had some studios make you wear grippy socks and some don't. And then I've also had it where I showed up and then they made me buy the grippy socks.
SpeakerYes, that's horrible.
Speaker 1So I guess it's something you should just check beforehand. How do you feel about the grippy socks?
SpeakerI'm not a fan. I think they work the first couple uses, but once those things go in the wash, you lose that. Yeah. Um, and I love just be on your feet. And we have some grippy little pads uh around the studio that I use in case feet are sweaty that day. But honestly, I don't think we need grippy socks. Um, I think it's just another opportunity for these businesses to generate more money.
Speaker 1I I was wearing um, I will wear them sometimes like when I'm cold. But then yeah, it is true because once you've worn them a couple of times, the grippy starts to wear off. And then I'm just ripping it off because I'm it's more of a problem. And they're expensive. Yes. Yeah, for something that's already expensive.
unknownYep.
Long-Term Benefits of Pilates
Speaker 1So let's talk about long term. We touched on this a little bit. You mentioned your kids starting at eight, but it's funny in our youth we learn sports, like PE, you learn sports. We don't learn things that we can do our entire lives. And once you have a career and family or your body starts to hurt, and it's perimenopause is killing me with my frozen shoulder. But I see it as a forever activity. And you mentioned somebody, what did you say? 78?
Speaker78, yes.
Speaker 1Wow. And how long has that person been doing Pilates?
unknown10 years.
Speaker 1Oh my gosh.
SpeakerShe said she only wished she found it sooner.
Speaker 1Oh wow. So it's not peak performance and goodbye. It's adaptable. It's a life thing. Yes.
Who Shouldn't Try Pilates?
Speaker 1Is there anybody that wouldn't like Pilates? Have you come across anybody where they haven't liked it or it hasn't been a good fit for them?
SpeakerNot many, but it would be somebody who loves that high intensity, that it's addicted to that high-intensity crossfit, not really engaging into certain muscles, turning muscles on, creating a body awareness, connecting the breath with the body. Um, those type of people, I don't know if they're fans of Pilates. They need it. They don't realize that they need it. So I have definitely converted some CrossFit people to Pilates, and they've all loved it. So I haven't trained anybody that I've met that said, I don't like this, isn't for me. But I can see that there is a there is a group of people who are not disciplined enough to slow down, focus on eccentric movement, and connect with their bodies again.
Communicating With Your Instructor
Speaker 1I know for me, it's been an unusual exercise because I feel like I can do it whether I'm not feeling well, I can do it a little bit low-key, or I can come in and say, make me hurt tomorrow. A lot of times I tell you, my butt is getting saggy, make it hurt tomorrow. Um, but it also really helps me with stress because compared to other exercises, it depends, get the studio's really busy, but and if the music's on, and but it you're you're laying there and sometimes it can be quiet and you're focusing on your breathing, and your mind can't just spiral on what you're gonna make for dinner or the meeting you have in the afternoon, all of those things that our minds do to us.
SpeakerYes, time to check in with yourself, your body. I try not to count so then people can just focus on the movement, what I'm expecting of them.
Speaker 1I thought you didn't count because you were making me do more.
SpeakerThat's a plus. And it's really hard to count and teach. But when I start counting, people get to that 10 and then they just sit there. And then I've got somebody in the corner who wants to go 15, so she'll go 15. So I don't, I want the class in sync and I want them to all understand why we're doing this movement and use the correct breath and get there and not think about, hey, what am I doing for dinner later? I gotta run, I gotta do this carpool, I gotta do this. You have an hour. I'm gonna give you an hour and I want you to just sit and soak in that whole hour and connect with your body and move intentionally with it.
Speaker 1It really is the most amazing exercise for me. So before we wrap, so anybody that is in Jacksonville, Florida, we'll include links in the show for Amy and Cortex. Um, but last
Final Thoughts
Speaker 1question if somebody listening takes just one action after this episode, what should it be?
SpeakerStart pulling up the studios near you, do a little research. Sometimes you'll see instructor bio, go into the studio, get the feel of the studio, the energy. Um, and you all of us instructors would love to talk to potential clients. So they'll sit down and talk with you. Um, but I would definitely start with like just trying to find studios that are nearby.
Speaker 1But is there anything else that you would want somebody to know? Any last thoughts?
SpeakerUm, I loved what you said about Pilates. Like you can make it what you want. Um, it will always be challenging. It's nothing that you're going to perfect. So it's always there for you. You're never going to be like, oh wow, I just dominate this exercise and I'm moving on to the next. That will never happen in Pilates. And I think it's there for the energy that you show up that day.
Speaker 1Yeah, and I think that makes it really unique because if you think about anything else, if you if you did have an injury or whatever, you can only go so far down with the weights. But with Pilates, there are a lot of adjustments to do. Absolutely.
Closing
Speaker 1Thank you so much for joining us today. That's it for what I expected. If this saved you time, money, or regret, hit follow, subscribe, and share it with the friend who always has a quick question before she buys. Got a topic you want me to unpack? Send it my way. See you next time.
